Wednesday, December 3, 2008

The Joos Love To Ski


The Joos hate to ski. Seriously hate it. However, the Joos' father thinks skiing is next to Godliness, and so, throughout their childhood, the Joos were forced to ski. Since both Joos suffer from altitude sickness, Joo skiing was, as you might imagine, the source of much hilarity.


Every year (sometimes TWICE a fecking year), the Joos' would be hauled via bus to some torturous resort in Colorado. The zaniness would begin with the Joos puking in garbage bags in the bus from about 5,000 ft. After reaching the resort of hell, madcap fun would ensue. Such fun included but was not limited to: the Joos perfecting the "puking snowplow" from the top of Vail downward whilst Father Joo snowplowed backwards in front of them shouting, "Plant! Turn! Plant! Turn! Come on, girls, you can do it!"; vomiting with such force and magnitude that the Joos were forced to ride down the slopes (at least once a season) on snow machines with ski patrol officers; oft' vomiting upon arrival at the base of a mountain in the trashcans located handily next to persons eating their lunch; and many, many others.

While everyone knows that nostalgia can color one's memory, making events seem rosier than they actually were, the Joos can assure readers that throughout the Circus-Parade-Super-Fun-Time that was the Joos' skiing career, they managed to appear cool. The Joos offer their readers as proof, Exhibit 154:

Caption: Good run, Joo. Let's shake it off and head to the chalet for a toddy.

Alternate Caption: I had to use my glove as a puke receptacle. I hope they have some more of these fashion forward items in the ski shop.

Alternate Alternate Caption: I believe I puked the back of my head off, so hard did I puke.

3 comments:

  1. I like that despite it all, the Joos are so fashion forward.

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  2. Bad Joo were you really posting this at 5:32 AM? That is true commitment to your art. Thank you. Thank you.

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  3. 5:32 am PACIFIC TIME. I'm in Californ-i-a sunning myself.

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