This Joo has been gone for many moons. It takes a real emergency to tear Bad Joo away from M. This is just such an emergency.
It has come to this Joo's attention that Anthropologie is off its fucking rocker. That's right. www.anthropologie.com sucks limp donkey pantsuit, apparently.
The jury will direct its attention to Exhibit A:
Now, these Joos recognize that Anthropologie has to ride the cutting edge, the razor's edge, if you will, of fashion. But it appears to these Joos that Anthropologie slit its wrist on said cutting edge, bleeding all over the good carpets and reminding us of why Anthropologie can't have nice things.
The jury will direct its attention to Exhibit B:
$1900 to look like a fat Israeli Heidi?
The jury will direct its attention to Exhibit C:
It's almost as if Anthropologie's buyers came across a lot of bad Simplicity patterns from the 1980's in some forgotten warehouse. And the model brought her own vintage Contempo Casuals belt. Whose idea was it to pair this with a white tee? And again, WTF???
We were all forced to wear this skirt to a piano recital. It didn't help to pair the damn thing with bangle bracelets then, and it's not helping now. And denim shirt much? Ow.
This is not over. The Hammer pants haven't been discussed, and the $2,000 jacket stolen from some tribesman passed out on peyote has not even been brought up.
This isn't over, Anthro. Go back to the drawing boards, and we'll make it stop. Until then, IT BURNS!