Thursday, November 4, 2010

The Little House That Couldn't, Apparently

So, this Joo is still in the process of purchasing the Little House That Could and is presently trying to close an FHA 203K Rehab Loan, or as the Pro's like to call it, an "Are You Fecking Kidding Me?" loan. For those of you not in the know, an FHA 203K Rehab Loan is a loan designed to allow home purchasers to borrow up to 110% of the value of a home at the time of purchase in order to make approved repairs and improvements to a home that will be their primary residence. Funds are disbursed directly to the contractors or homeowners making the repairs by the bank at various points throughout the rehab process.

Real Estate Agents and Mortgage Brokers fear the AYFKM loans, for they require a mountain of paperwork and certification taller and more evil than Mount Doom, and (this Joo is pretty sure) are underwritten only by Sauron. This Joo fears nothing. And so she perseveres. And it will happen, my pretties. This Joo and that dirty foreigner husband of hers will raise their child in the Little House That Could. ETA for our closing is 30 days.

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