I Told You So

Sometimes the GJ's friend (Guest Krunker's ho) likes to make her do things. Like go to the library for story time. GJ tried to get out of it. GJ tried to warn the Krunker ho, but she didn't listen. So GJ, cute B, and grouchy A arrived at the downtown library (note this is a 25 min drive for GJ.) GJ not showered, very greasy, grouchy, and knowing damn well this would not be good, parked and made way into library. While on way into library the wheel of the stroller broke. Awesome.


So GJ got into library, and there was the Krunker ho, all showered and fresh and cute and skinny. This is some bullshit, thought GJ. A ran over, grabbed all the farm animals and proceeded to hoard them for the next 2 hours. She refused to play with anyone. One girl in particular was so devastated by the not sharing of the animals that she proceeded to give A the stink eye for 2 hours straight.


Then for some reason GJ and Krunker ho decided that they should have lunch with the bitches (husbands). Also not a good plan. Why does ANYONE EVER THINK IT IS A GOOD IDEA TO GO OUT TO EAT WITH KIDS? Why does ANYONE EVER THINK THAT JUST ONE TIME IT MIGHT WORK? GJ's bitch (husband) just looked at her. GJ's response..."Welcome to the hell that is my life." (chocolate milk flying in background, A neighing like a dying horse and possibly acting out the death, B crying, etc). Guest Krunker and ho just looking on while their son A-bomb acted all cute and nice.

I love It. It does EVERYTHING

That's right. The Garmin Forerunner 405. GJ's hubby's birthday present from the Good Jew of Bloomfield Hills. It has become the new obsession in GJ's house. Why? Because it satellite links GJ's hubby to his home computer through a watch or some shit. It tells him how many miles he has run. AND...(drumroll) when he stops at a crosswalk while running, the little man on the forerunner bends over like he is catching his breath. OH MY GOD. How awesome. It's a frickin' technological masterpiece. When GJ asked her husband (who was plugging and unplugging the Garmin into its charger) why it was so great, his response was, "I love it. It does everything." Like make sweet love to you? GJ does not think so. GJ's plan is to pick hubby up from work, blind fold him, drive him out in Amishland, spin him around 90x, release him, speed off kicking up gravel in his face, and let him Garmin his way home. We'll see how awesome it is. Thanks to the Good Jew whom I would mention by name, except for the fact that he told me to "NEVER MENTION MY NAME ON THE BLOG." Fine.